Funerals Aren't Funny....but....

We buried Robin’s uncle on Tuesday of this week. He was only 66 years old and finally succumbed to a LENGTHY battle with Emphysema (if you ever want to convince yourself, your kids, or someone you love of the damage that smoking can do to your body, go spend a day in ICU watching a man battle for every breath. It was agonizing to behold…so for his sake, I’m glad he has moved “Home”!).

And while funerals aren’t supposed to be funny occasions, there is inevitably something that happens at every funeral that makes me giggle. Maybe that’s just my irreverent side…or it may just my search for something that will keep me from crying (cuz I am a HUGE crier!). But this one had a couple of moments that made me smile and wince all at the same time.

• The Pentecostal congregation in Marietta, OK, was very gracious to serve lunch prior to the Service. We were one of the last of the family to arrive...and by the time we got there the line for lunch had already formed. And man, what a spread! I sat with my kids while everyone else went through the line…so I was one of the last folks to go through. There was an enormous amount of food left over – enough to feed the folks who were there twice more…at least! I commented to the lady who seemed to be in charge, “Wow, y’all sure know how to get a lot of food together!” She said, “Well, we were told Abe had 16 brothers and sisters, so we should expect quite a crowd.” I replied, “Yeah, he HAD 16 brothers and sisters…but I guess no one told y’all half of them are dead!” I don’t think she was amused…

• As people passed by the opened casket, Elijah (my oldest) said confidently, “There’s nothing to be afraid of. That’s just his body – his Spirit has gone to Heaven.” So I quickly grabbed his hand and started walking toward the casket. He INSTANTLY became a blubbering, hysterical mass…pleading, “No daddy, no – don’t make me look at him!

• At the end of the graveside service, the plan was to release balloons to symbolize Abe’s ascension into Heaven. Unfortunately…the helium in the balloons had leaked out. So instead of ascending…the balloons went skipping along the ground. Hope that isn’t a bad omen about Abe’s spirit!!!

• It’s never a good idea for women to wear tall heels to the graveside…especially after a rain…and REALLY especially (if that’s grammatically correct) when they’re a bit on the heavy side. It can make navigating the moist red clay of a Southern Oklahoma cemetery a bit harrowing. But it makes for great people watching!

I promise – no more irreverent posts….today!