YIKES!!!
As I've mentioned previously it's been awhile since I've had a good, long sleep. Case in point, I was up this morning at 3:30 entertaining young Jacob. We had a good time...though I would have much preferred to be staring at the back of my eyeballs! He thinks it's especially funny watching his daddy jump rope and lift weights. Come to think of it, pretty much everyone thinks it's funny to watch me jump rope or lift weights.
ANYHOW...the entire family was asleep at 10:30...and I was making that fateful tour of my favorite channels before I went to bed. I stopped on the History Channel...and was both horrified and intrigued by the topic.
They were examining the phenomenon of Spontaneous Human Combustion. And not only were they examining it, but they were detailing four cases of individuals thought to have died in this grisly manner. And whoop-ded-doo, they even showed pictures!!! The most disturbing picture was of two legs connected to what looked like a pile of charcoal ash. Unfortunately this poor lady was sitting in her recliner when her body decided to engage in, what one of the "experts" called, the Human Hiroshima Effect. WOW!!! That's a little insensitive, isn't it?
There were three other instances they reviewed as well...and each came complete with EXTREMELY graphic photos of folks who looked like a marshmallow that got too close to the campfire. All of the folks either smoked at the time of their death or had recently kicked the habit...so there was plenty of room for skepticism. But the "experts" defended their claim that human beings can turn into a fireball with no prior warning.
Now I'm one of the biggest chickens in the world. The list of my fears is long:
- Heights
- Snakes
- Guns
- Getting sick in a public restroom (or the restroom of a wealthy person)
- Converting an uncontested layup
- Being left alone with my three children for long periods of time
However...."Scanners" did creep me out.
posted by stuckinthe80s @ 8:37 AM
2 Comments:
Chris, you need to find the Mythbusters show (Discovery Channel)where they "busted" that one. Urban Legend...
As far as some of your fears are concerned:
I'm with you on the Heights one. Snakes: OK
Guns: I grew up in Canada hunting moose, eh?
Public Restrooms: Again OK, Uncontested lay-ups are the ONLY ones this short guy can do: Again OK
On to the "being with the kids for long periods of time": Your kids are at the age where it is attention-from-you heavy. My wife is speaking at three ladies retreats lately, I do the whole weekend. It's nice when they are older - dress themselves, built-in babysitter for the other ones... hang in there. Try it in little bits and you'll get better!
I read way too much as a kid and as a result was terrified of spontaneous combustion, Bigfoot (I just knew he was going to come crashing through my bedroom window one night even though we lived in New Mexico, where no Bigfoot sightings have ever been reported), killer bees, UFOs, dopplegangers (a ghost of a living person), poltergeists and the kids that have that disease where they age very quickly. (I read about that one in the National Enquirer one night and I remember my mom holding me while I was literally shaking.)
I still have an overactive imagination. I won't work in my classroom at church during the week when no one else is in that part of the building. The cleaning lady has told me too many ghost stories...
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