"I asked for a car; I got a computer."

Looking for a commentary that uses big words and ponders the deeper meanings of various topics? Well...you've come to the wrong place. This blog is all about extolling the greatness of Christ, the joy of marriage, the rollercoaster ride called parenthood, the supremacy of the 1980's...and doing all of it at a fifth grade reading level!

Friday, December 24, 2010

Oh No They Didn't

I LOVE CHRISTMAS!!! It's the season of giving, and a time when the world turns its focus to the birth of our Savior. And I love everything about Christmas - the lights, the food, the shopping, the gifts, the movies, and...most of all...the music! Christmas music is great, and nothing gets me more in the mood for the holiday than hearing "It's The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year."

So I logged onto my music service a couple of weeks ago to download some of those timeless Christmas favorites. I love the modern tunes as much as the classics (U2's rendition of "Baby Please Come Home" is probably my favorite). SO as I scrolled through the catalog of available holiday songs, I was stunned by the number of Christmas albums out there. Everyone...

...and I mean EVERYONE...has released a Christmas album!

So I did a little sampling of some of the music out there. Most of it was great...but not all of it is good. SO...here is a friendly little peak at some of the Christmas albums to avoid...

The Beach Boys - Granted, I like the Beach Boys as much as the next person...and their 1964 album with "Little Saint Nick" on it is great. But in 1990, Brian Wilson struck out on his own to release a solo Christmas album. AND THEN, they reunited to do ANOTHER Christmas album in 1998. This trend wreaks of "WE NEED MONEY!" Once is enough, gentlemen. Special acknowledgment goes to Barry Manilow, Michael Bolton, and Johnny Mathis who also released multiple albums.

Billy Idol ("Happy Holidays - A Very Special Christmas Album") - Yes, I'm sure it's special...so gather the family around to hear the punk music pioneer that gave us "Flesh For Fantasy," "Rock The Cradle Of Love," and "Dancing With Myself" (then anthem of 'self love') sing "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen" and "Silent Night."

Barbara Streisand ("Christmas Memories") - REALLY?!?!?!? Wouldn't that be like Alabama getting back together to release a Kwanzaa album?

Elton John - His compilation, entitled "Elton John's Christmas Party" is full of Christmas classics. But the sheer thought of going to an Elton John Christmas Party makes me fear Mistletoe like never before!

The Oak Ridge Boys ("Christmas Cookies") - Giddy up, a oom-pa-pa, oom-pa-pa, NO NO!

Twisted Sister ("A Twisted Christmas") - Their rendition of "O Come All Ye Faithful" is awesome, and follows the same chord progression as "We're Not Going To Take It." But from there...eh...

Lynyrd Skynyrd ("Christmas Time Again") - Grab the Jack Daniels bottle and a folding chair and head to the front porch to hear the Southern rockers sing old favorites like "Santa's Messin' With The Kids" and "Santa Claus Wants Some Lovin.'"



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